Women; A Bitter-Sweet Symphony!

On the composed exterior:
In my capacity, I know I have given the best that I could have. Now, it is up to people if they really want to understand "my heart". If they don't want to, its not my problem, its the problem with their understanding. I have tried my best, with utmost dignity and compassion, to make people see the reality, but if they still choose to live with illusions, then its their decision. But yes, when-and if-the wall of their illusions will break and they will realize their fault, I will be gone, taking care of people who understand my heart and value me.

In the insecure interior:
I did the best I could have. I genuinely have but I still don't understand why people fail to see that!Where did I go wrong? What is it that I should have done, but I did not do? Why people I care about are not ready to understand me and stand by me? Am i that wrong? But I never wanted to be that way. I genuinely wanted to do the best I could for the people I love, I tried, but I don't understand where did I lack.Many a times I even dealt with immense discomfort, only because their comfort was a priority to me. Where the hell did I lack?

At the calm core of her soul:
Its OK! I have always kept my intentions pure, my heart never had even a tiny bit of negativity for anyone and of course, in my capacity, I have ensured that I put in the best of efforts for the people who matter to me. Now, it would be wiser to leave everything on my destiny, which, will be a result of my KARMA. Life is all about the law of "cause and effect", the principle of "you shall reap as you sow", in simple words: KARMA. Yes, i do desire certain outcomes to my efforts, but I need to remember, that only efforts are in my hands, not the results. Moreover, I need to have faith in my intentions. I may not get what I desire, irrespective of the dedication of the my effort. But it is not necessary that the reason behind this is lack of effort, maybe, it is that I deserve something better than what I desire and at this point, I am not able to understand it. I just need to wait and hold on. What is meant to be, will always find its way.
Yes I am deeply pained and I want many answers, but its OK to not have answers all the time. It is OK to live in ambiguity, maybe I am just not prepared to know the answer. Let me understand the questions first, and when the right time comes, the answers will reveal themselves. All I need to take care of, is that, in all my suffering-which is an essential requirement for my growth-I do not let even a tiny bit of negativity enter my heart. My intentions have to be pure, my heart has to be compassionate and my efforts have to come out of the same compassion. Rest will be taken care of!

That is a women! A bitter-sweet symphony. She has the tendency to be insecure, confident and a believer...all at the same time. Of course, she goes through her own journey and although all these traits are an integral part of who she is, their dominance in her thought process changes as she grows in life.

When she begins her journey from being a girl to a women and faces the world in their eyes, its usually the insecure side of her that is of high dominance, and nothing is wrong with it, that too is a part of her journey. Then, when she realizes that life is not a fairy tail and no matter what happens, LIFE GOES ON, she learns the art of balancing the confident exterior and the insecure interior with perfection. And then, as she grows, as she gains experience in life, observes people and makes learning an integral part of her daily life, she understands the importance, relevance and authenticity of the calm core of her soul. At this stage, its a calm soul that dominates.

It is this roller-coaster ride that enables a women to see through and believe even in times of ambiguity. She has faced every aspect of life and hence, develops an attitude of Compassion, understanding and non-judgement in her daily life. And this is why, she has the tendency to be considerate even when she is in intense pain.